Bi! Chuan!
Bi!'s personal log

Wile maeking a trip entu tuwn, I stuppe! uver in tye pikle! khiken legg waar I stumbet! upun a pekuliar gruup uf fulk. A man klaaming tu be a !uktur, a smell une wu seeme! tu never stup talzing, an! a smell bir! wu was frightening tu luuk upun as wiell as une utyer wu shuwie! nu astuun!ing kharaekteristiks. Tyey seeme! tu ell be gatyaar! aruun! a pieke uf paper tyat prumise! a large payment uf gul!. I was entrigue! by tye gul! as I nee tu sekure my uwnership uf my hume, but I was ateprehensive tu atepruaekh tye gruup. I was huwiever bekune! furty by tye Sturyteller an! invite! tu aekkumpeny tyem. Tyis may be tye uppurtunity I have been waating fur; I might nut nee! tu pay fur my hume azter ell.

Later tyat !ay wie ma!e uur way tu a buil!ing waarupun wie met a frustrating Klerk wu prumise! us gul! fur guing un tye quest tu unkuver tye mystery uf tye strange Sleeping Sikness. I put my mark upun a pieke uf paper tyat seeme! tu be an arbitrary stipulatiun fur rekeiving tye 200 gul! I nee.

Wie lezt tye kity an! searkhe! tye kuuntrysi!e fur tye kause uf tye sleeping sikness. Tye Skarybir! was persistent in attempting tu ri!e upun Mystery an! in exkhange fur a ri!e upun my shuul!er he uffaar! 200 gul! tu be paa! sumetime in tye future.

Wie stumbet! upun a large !ragunfly an ! nu suuner ! i! tye beautiful kreature lan! un my shuul !er tyat tye Sturyteller beggan tu babbet uff tye life stury uf tye kreature. I paa! nu attentiun tu tye gnume but sumeune wu kan un him trie! tu attaek tye tying. I shuue! it uff an ! it beggan tu fly away. I pursue! tye buhg as it flew uff, flinging tye Skarybir! wu ateparently kan’t fly. Wie khase! it baek tu a large mansiun. Agaanst my better ju!gment, I fulluwie ! tye rest uf tye party entu tye likely buhg infeste ! ! wielling. Ateparently tyese buhgs are tye kause uf tye sikness wie are haar tu !iskuver. Wie furme ! a tutem pule uf puwier an ! I elluwie ! tye Sturyteller untu my shuul!ers, wile tye Skarybir ! reste ! upun his an ! me upun my hurse. Wie kunstrukte ! quite a pile.

Wie squirme! tyruuhgh tye !uur an ! tye tutem uf puwier. Tye huuse was fille ! wity mure buhgs, as I suspekte !. I was exkite ! tu squash tye buhgs, wuse tyik hi!es puse! a khellenge but wuul! alsu maeke a supreme material fur my krazt. Wie wa tyruuhgh ruums uf tye beast, wity Mystery squishing her faar share, wat a skille! stee!. It was !uring tyis time tyat tye unname! une pruve! himself tu be quite Kuurageuus as he pruvuke! an! witystuu! tye unslauhght uf tye kreatures. Wie meny peuple wu ha! been kille! by tye buhgs as wiell as meny wu ha! been put tu sleep. Wie wuke tye sleeping unes as wie fuun! tyem an! instrukte! tyem tu waat in tye library. !uring tyis time sume uf tye party, spekifikelly tye !uktur, relieve! tye peuple uf tyeir valuabets

As suun as I bekame bure! wity slauhghtering tye repulsive kreatures, wie pruvuke! tye attaek uf a larger must mure resilient buhg kelle!, by tye Sturyteller, a slayer. An! in it nearly live! up tu tye name wien I tusse! tye Kuurageuus une tu tye gruun! almust killing him. Tye !uktur live! up tu his name an! injekte! him wity a serum tyat heale! his wuun!s an! save! his life.

Meny ruums later uf killing tye !umb buhgs, wie stumbet! entu tye laar uf tye largest une uf ell, wuse hi!e wuul! maeke a furmi!abet suit uf armur. Her breaty was abet tu put tye gruup tu sleep an! tutelly messe! us up. Wie eventuelly prevaale! waar abet tu save meny uf tye ukkupants uf tye hume.

Wie waar invite! tu atten! a funeral tu respekt tye fellen servants an! family members uf tye El!ritkh huuse, ateparently tye name uf tye nubets wie just save!. In an attempt tu shuw sume level uf humanity, I agree! tu gu, I suppuse it will impress my new kumra!es wu I shuul! try nut tu uffen!.

Tyat night wile ing tye bu!ies uf tye frum hungry animals, wie waar attaeke! by a ban! uf fluffy hyenas. I kalme! tyem an! tuuk tye kutest une entu my arms. Wat a nike pet. Tye utyers seem tu like him tuu.

Wie agree! tu meet at sume graveyar! plut tu hunur tye an! hea baek tu tuwn. Wie wient tu tye guil!huuse tu klaam uur rewar!. Unke I ha! my gul! I ma!e up my min!, I lezt tye !uktur, tye Kuurageuus une, tye Sturyteller an! Skarybir! in tye !ust an! rushe! baek hume azter a shurt supply !etuur. Tyaar is mukh wurk tu be

“While making a trip into town, I stopped over in the pickled chicken leg where I stumbled upon a peculiar group of folk. A man claiming to be a doctor, a small one who seemed to never stop talking, and a small bird who was frightening to look upon as well as one other who showed no astounding characteristics. They seemed to all be gathered around a piece of paper that promised a large payment of gold. I was intrigued by the gold as I needed to secure my ownership of my home, but I was apprehensive to approach the group. I was however beckoned forth by the Storyteller and invited to accompany them. This may be the opportunity I have been waiting for; I might not need to pay for my home after all.

Later that day we made our way to a building whereupon we met a frustrating Clerk who promised us gold for going on the quest to uncover the mystery of the strange Sleeping Sickness. I put my mark upon a piece of paper that seemed to be an arbitrary stipulation for receiving the 200 gold I needed.

We left the city and searched the countryside for the cause of the sleeping sickness. The Scarybird was persistent in attempting to ride upon Mystery and in exchange for a ride upon my shoulder he offered 200 gold to be paid sometime in the future.

We stumbled upon a large dragonfly and no sooner did the beautiful creature land on my shoulder that the Storyteller began to babble off the life story of the creature. I paid no attention to the gnome but someone who can understand him tried to attack the thing. I shooed it off and it began to fly away. I pursued the bug as it flew off, flinging the Scarybird who apparently can’t fly. We chased it back to a large mansion. Against my better judgment, I followed the rest of the party into the likely bug infested dwelling. Apparently these bugs are the cause of the sickness we are here to discover. We formed a totem pole of power and I allowed the Storyteller onto my shoulders, while the Scarybird rested upon his and me upon my horse. We constructed quite a pile.

We squirmed through the door and dismantled the totem of power. The house was filled with more bugs, as I suspected. I was excited to squash the bugs, whose thick hides posed a challenge but would also make a supreme material for my craft. We waded through rooms of the beast, with Mystery squishing her fair share, what a skilled steed. It was during this time that the unnamed one proved himself to be quite Courageous as he provoked and withstood the onslaught of the creatures. We discovered many people who had been killed by the bugs as well as many who had been put to sleep. We woke the sleeping ones as we found them and instructed them to wait in the library. During this time some of the party, specifically the Doctor, relieved the people of their valuables

As soon as I became bored with slaughtering the repulsive creatures, we provoked the attack of a larger must more resilient bug called, by the Storyteller, a slayer. And indeed it nearly lived up to the name when I tossed the Courageous one to the ground almost killing him. The Doctor lived up to his name and injected him with a serum that healed his wounds and saved his life.

Many rooms later of killing the dumb bugs, we stumbled into the lair of the largest one of all, whose hide would make a formidable suit of armor. Her breath was able to put the group to sleep and totally messed us up. We eventually prevailed were able to save many of the occupants of the home.

We were invited to attend a funeral to respect the fallen servants and family members of the Eldritch house, apparently the name of the nobles we just saved. In an attempt to show some level of humanity, I agreed to go, I suppose it will impress my new comrades who I should try not to offend.

That night while defending the bodies of the deceased from hungry animals, we were attacked by a band of fluffy hyenas. I calmed them and took the cutest one into my arms. What a nice pet. The others seem to like him too.

We agreed to meet at some graveyard plot to honor the dead and headed back to town. We went to the guildhouse to claim our reward. Once I had my gold I made up my mind, I left the Doctor, the Courageous one, the Storyteller and Scarybird in the dust and rushed back home after a short supply detour. There is much work to be done!”

Bi! Chuan's! log 2

To!aey my lifu waes saev! by Sutoarytullur. I waes aelonu in my shaekk haeving jusut gottun ruae!y to huae! into town whun I busut by 2 vilu Saehuaegin. Sutillsut wuaery from thu pruvious !aeys kombaet I waes in quitu ae pr!ikaemunt. AE flung jaevulin from thu buaesut full! mu to groun! right aes Sutoarytullur kaemu waelking up. My laesut sight aes I to thu groun! waes Sutoarytullur running to my si!u. AE fuw sukon!s laetur I woku up, Sutoarytullurs huaeling maegik hae! saev! mu. I waetkh! aes thu jaevulin woun! klos! muaenwhilu Mysutury baerraeg! thu monsuturs with ae flurry of hoovus aen! krush! thum to !usut. I graebb! thu wuaepons of thu Saehuaegin, 2 baernaeklu unkrusut! tri!unts, aes ae rumin!ur of thu uvunt. I n’t haevu moaru timu to think aes I graebb! Sutoarytullur aen! pull! him onto Mysutury, wu wuru running laetu!

Wu aerriv! in town jusut in timu foar thu funurael. I’m not mukh foar this sillsuty long proku!ing; in my kulturu wu bury thu aet suae whikh taekus konsi!uraebly luss timu. Wu mae!u it haelfwaey through thu prokuss whun ae sutraengu baenk of fog roll! in. Thu Sutoarytullur tol! us aell aebout thu fog whikh turn! out to bu somu kin! of foul maegik thaet koul! aenimaetu thu . Whaet follow! waes ae long baettlu aes wu tri! to sutuff thu baekk to whuru thuy bulong!. Moaru aen! moaru kupt on rising aen! thaenkfully onu of thu Klurgy ovurlooking thu funurael waes aeblu to baenish thu kruaeturus. With his hulp wu killsut! thu aebominaetion. Thu Noblu bugaen to sutrip off his juwulry in oar!ur to kompunsaetu us foar !usutroying this kruaeturu. Thu Skaerybir! aen! thu Kouraeguous onu took thu rings with gluu aen! suum! to bu konfus! whun I aen! thu Sutoarytullur ruturn! our ruwaer!s. Not waenting to aekkupt moaru gol! from thu Noblu, who nothing to kaeusu thu aettaekk aen! hae! no rusponsibility to kompunsaetu us, but sutillsut fuuling liku I somu kin! of priku, I imploar! thu tumplu of Puloar, whuru wu hae! buun foar thu funurael, to show thuir aepprukiaetion. I waes hoping to usu thu kirkumsutaenkus to gaein aekkuss to huaeling maegik, whikh waes aell I nu!! aet thu timu, but thu Klurgy offur! mu ae gigaentik saekk of gol!. It waesn’t whaet I waes uxpukting but not unwulkomu aen! I us! to purkhaesu thu huaeling maegik I sought in foarm ae maegik waen!. I intun!! to shaeru thu gol! with my honoaraeblu friun!, thu Sutoarytullur, but whun Skaerybir! saew thu saekk of gol! hu luaept foarwaer! to klaeim his shaeru. Not haeving thu huaert to shoo him aewaey, but not without showing somu !ispluaesuru, I aellow! him to taeku whaet hu thought waes his shaeru. Hu’s ae vury Gru

I took my rumaeining gol! aen! us! it to buy somu moaru uquipmunt. Mosut impoartaently waes ae shiul!, whosu quaelitius I hae! gluaen! by lisutuning to thu Sutoarytullur, thaet woul!n’t bu sukh ae bur!un to kaerry aen! swim with. I sought out thu itum aen! foun! ae graekious murkhaent who sol! it to mu.

Not to my surprisu, thuy Gru waent! moaru gol! so hu wunt to thu Guil! aen! ruquusut! woark slaeughturing kruaeturus. I waes not pluaes! by this i!uae but my bae! fuulings wuru whun I foun! wu woul! bu killsuting Ushaemoi, ae raeku thaet thu Sutoarytullur aes huinous, unnaeturael kruaeturus. Wu wuru going to fin! thum in aebout ae wuuk.

I us! thu koming !aeys to kraeft my boaet, whikh I kaen haeppily saey turn! out mukh buttur thaen I thought it woul!! My nuw aermoar is imprussivu aelso. Unfoartunaetuly my nuw friun! is not taeking kin!ly to his traeining. Hu sutillsut suums to liku mu so I’ll kontinuu to try. Foar now though, I haevu ae naemu foar him, “!ufiaent”

AE wuuk laetur wu sought out thu kruaeturus aen! lur! thum to aettaekk by flaeunting our laergu saekks of monuy. Thuy wuru woarthy fous aen! maenaeg! to killsut thu Kouraeguous onu, who by now haes provun himsulf to bu Foolhaer!y. AEftur wu killsut! thu gross kruaeturus wu took Foolhaer!y’s bo!y baekk to town. Wu gaethur! our fun!s toguthur, inklu!ing somu gol! thaet wu wuru haen!! foar fruu (whaet ae kin! purson!) aen! brought it to thu Tumplu of Puloar whuru somu maegnifikuntly powurful Klurik brought Foolhaer!y baekk from thu !

Kursing thu go!s foar his misfoartunu (rupuaet!ly) aen! kursing somu othur go! foar his laekk of wuaelth, Foolhaer!y aen! Gru wunt baekk to guil! in suaerkh of moaru kurtaein !uaeth aen! unkurtaein wuaelth. This timu wu wuru to suuk out ae tribu of oarks thaet haes mysuturiously . So wu trukk! into thu Saeykael foarusut (so kaell! by thu Sutoarytullur) in suaerkh of thu tribu. Whilu suaerkhing, ae mysuturious bir! laen!! on my shoul!ur, fuaering aenothur raegonfly, I lisutun! to thu Sutoarytullur aes hu tol! mu thu bir!’s faemily hisutoary. I gaevu thu bir! ae piuku of maengo aen! it haes totaelly taekun ae liking to mu, Swuut! Foolhaer!y suum! but hu owus mu ae bunkh of gol! so hu kaen SUTFU (sutop taelking Foolhaer!y, Uhhhg). AEftur klaeiming thu bir! I ro!u baekk homu, hopufully hu likus kulp snaekks. Goo! lukk to my kompaenions!

Today my life was saved by Storyteller. I was alone in my shack having just gotten ready to head into town when I beset by 2 vile Sahuagin. Still weary from the previous days combat I was in quite a predicament. A flung javelin from the beast felled me to ground right as Storyteller came walking up. My last sight as I dropped to the ground was Storyteller running to my side. A few seconds later I woke up, Storytellers healing magic had saved me. I watched as the javelin wound closed meanwhile Mystery barraged the monsters with a flurry of hooves and crushed them to dust. I grabbed the weapons of the Sahuagin, 2 barnacle encrusted tridents, as a reminder of the event. I didn’t have more time to think as I grabbed Storyteller and pulled him onto Mystery, we were running late!

We arrived in town just in time for the funeral. I’m not much for this silly long proceeding; in my culture we bury the dead at sea which takes considerably less time. We made it halfway through the process when a strange bank of fog rolled in. The Storyteller told us all about the fog which turned out to be some kind of foul magic that could animate the dead. What followed was a long battle as we tried to stuff the dead back to where they belonged. More and more kept on rising and thankfully one of the Clergy overlooking the funeral was able to banish the creatures. With his help we killed the abomination. The Noble began to strip off his jewelry in order to compensate us for destroying this creature. The Scarybird and the Courageous one took the rings with glee and seemed to be confused when I and the Storyteller returned our rewards. Not wanting to accept more gold from the Noble, who did nothing to cause the attack and had no responsibility to compensate us, but still feeling like I deserved some kind of price, I implored the temple of Pelor, where we had been for the funeral, to show their appreciation. I was hoping to use the circumstances to gain access to healing magic, which was all I needed at the time, but the Clergy offered me a gigantic sack of gold. It wasn’t what I was expecting but not unwelcome and I used to purchase the healing magic I sought in form a magic wand. I intended to share the gold with my honorable friend, the Storyteller, but when Scarybird saw the sack of gold he leapt forward to claim his share. Not having the heart to shoo him away, but not without showing some displeasure, I allowed him to take what he thought was his share. He’s a very Greedybird

I took my remaining gold and used it to buy some more equipment. Most importantly was a shield, whose qualities I had gleaned by listening to the Storyteller, that wouldn’t be such a burden to carry and swim with. I sought out the item and found a gracious merchant who sold it to me.

Not to my surprise, they Greedybird wanted more gold so he went to the Guild and requested work slaughtering creatures. I was not pleased by this idea but my bad feelings were dispersed when I found we would be killing Ushamoi, a race that the Storyteller described as heinous, unnatural creatures. We were going to find them in about a week.

I used the coming days to craft my boat, which I can happily say turned out much better than I thought it would! My new armor is impressive also. Unfortunately my new friend is not taking kindly to his training. He still seems to like me so I’ll continue to try. For now though, I have a name for him, “Ed”

A week later we sought out the creatures and lured them to attack by flaunting our large sacks of money. They were worthy foes and managed to kill the Courageous one, who by now has proven himself to be Foolhardy. After we killed the gross creatures we took Foolhardy’s body back to town. We gathered our funds together, including some gold that we were handed for free (what a kind person!) and brought it to the Temple of Pelor where some magnificently powerful Cleric brought Foolhardy back from the dead!

Cursing the gods for his misfortune (repeatedly) and cursing some other god for his lack of wealth, Foolhardy and Greedybird went back to guild in search of more certain death and uncertain wealth. This time we were to seek out a tribe of orcs that has mysteriously disappeared. So we trekked into the Saycal forest (so called by the Storyteller) in search of the tribe. While searching, a mysterious bird landed on my shoulder, fearing another dangerous dragonfly, I listened to the Storyteller as he told me the bird’s family history. I gave the bird a piece of mango and it has totally taken a liking to me, Sweet! Foolhardy seemed displeased but he owes me a bunch of gold so he can STFU (stop talking Foolhardy, Uhhhg). After claiming the bird I rode back home, hopefully he likes kelp snacks. Good luck to my companions!

Bi! Chuan's! log 3

Entry 3 ! rumaeins aes bulligurunt aes aelwaeys, hu likus mu but hu won’t sutaen! foar traeining. AEftur giving up on his traeining foar now, I wunt into town to kaenkul my mumburship to thu Haen!s of !iskovury. I !on’t waent to bu paert of ae group thaet promotus slaeughtur with kommurku. Not kool.

Yusutur! aey I waes aepproaekh! by ae ! aerfullaen who klaeim! thu uaesuturn tribu waes in troublu; thuy wuru buing thruaetun! by aen aermy of Saehuaegin. Not only aes my ! uty to fullow ! aerfullaen but to hopufully aekhiuvu somu muaesuru of ruvungu I not only aegru! to aessisut mysulf but I aelso voluntuur! thu rusut of my friun! s. Konvinking thu Sutoarytullur woul! bu uaesy unough but Foolhaer! y aen! thu Gru! ybir! woul! nu! somu kin! of ruwaer! of whikh thu !aerfullaen haevu nonu. I’ll jusut liu to thum, uaesy unough. Maeybu somuthing willsut komu up.

AEs I luft to gaethur thum, I foun! thum on my ! ooar sutup ruae! y to aekkompaeny mu (liku thuy kaen ruae! min! s). I promis! Gru! ybir! aen! Foolhaer!y untol! wuaelth aen! thuy suum konvink! foar now. Foolhaer! y suum! insult! aet thu thought of gutting ae ruwaer! , whaet ae sutraengu turn. Hu insisut! thaet hu waent! only to spruae! his naemu, whikh took mu by surpris! sinku hu pluae! s foar ruwaer!s foar uvury ! u!. Gru! ybir! bugaen to ruputitivuly try to jusutify his gru! inuss. AEppaeruntly hu’s ae ! raegon aen! aeppaeruntly ! raegons hoaer! wuaelth. Jusut bukaeusu I uaet fish it ! ousn’t maeku mu ae shaerk, Gru! ybir!. Sutoarytullur rupuaet! ovur aen! ovur aegaein (uvun moaru laetur) thaet hu waent! jusut to maeku mu haeppy. Thaet’s ae kaeusu I kaen gut buhin!, uvun if I ! on’t un! ursutaen! why.

Wu boaer ! ! my housu aen! bugaen to saeil uaesut to fin! thu ! aerfullaen tribu. I’m not mukh foar saeiling but I figur! it out, wu wuru jusut following thu shoaru aenywaey. Wu wuru aettaekk! thaet night by ae giaent ruptiliaen fish. AEftur ae ! aengurous baettlu wu sutopp! thu buaesut. Wu huael! its woun! s aeftur tying it up. I f! it somu kulp snaekks aeftur using somu of my maegik to taemu it. This ! aengurous !inosaeur (so kaell! by thu Sutoarytullur) woul! maeku ae goo! put. I’ll sikk my nuw !aengursaeur on my unumius!

I finish! thu traeining of my Koarrolaex (so kaell! by thu Sutoarytullur) aen! I’vu ! uki! ! to naemu him “Royael Raeinbow” foar thu maegikael spraey of koloars hu pro!ukus. I’vu taeught him to saey his naemu aen! hu !ous it now aell thu timu. I might rugrut thaet laetur, but foar now hu suums to bug thu Gru so thaet’s finu.

Wu aerriv! on thu koaesut of thu ! aerfullaen villsutaegu. Thuy invit! us in aen! bukaemu faemiliaer with mu aen! my group. Gru! ybir! bugaen to inquiru aebout thu unimaeginaeblu rikhus. Mukh to my ! iskomfoart, thu Tribael luae! ur ! i!n’t aettumpt to purputuaetu my liu… Uvurything waes finu in thu un! aes Gru! ybir! aegru! to hulp foar whaetuvur thu ! aerfullaen woul! offur.

!uring thu gruaet baettlu with thu Saehuaegin, Gu! ybir! aen! I wuru both saev! by Royael Raeinbow. Hu haes turn! out to bu quitu ae gruaet aessut to thu paerty. In thu kulubraetion thaet follow! thu Tribael luae! ur sutripp! himsulf of juwulry to paey thu group. Of koursu thuy aekkupt! mukh to my !ismaey. I saelvaeg! thu maegikael aermoar of onu of thu Saehuaegin aen! I plaen to mo! ify it aen! wuaer it mysulf, shaemu to lut sukh goo! khitin go to waesutu! Uvun aemong thu ! aerfullaen tribu I fult out of plaeku whilu my kompaenions kulubraet!. This uvunt only throws into ruaelity thu faekt thaet I maey not bulong aenywhuru. I’ll kontinuu to waen! ur though aen! hopufully thu kity of Gruunswaevu hol! s my ! usutiny within its waells.

(Whuru haes thu ! oktoar buun this wholu timu? I shoul! kaell him thu ! isaeppuaering ! oktoar)

Ed remains as belligerent as always, he likes me but he won’t stand for training. After giving up on his training for now, I went into town to cancel my membership to the Hands of Discovery. I don’t want to be part of a group that promotes slaughter with commerce. Not cool.

Yesterday I was approached by a darfellan who claimed the eastern tribe was in trouble; they were being threatened by an army of Sahuagin. Not only as my duty to fellow darfellan but to hopefully achieve some measure of revenge I not only agreed to assist myself but I also volunteered the rest of my friends. Convincing the Storyteller would be easy enough but Foolhardy and the Greedybird would need some kind of reward of which the darfellan have none. I’ll just lie to them, easy enough. Maybe something will come up.

As I left to gather them, I found them on my door step ready to accompany me (like they can read minds). I promised Greedybird and Foolhardy untold wealth and they seem convinced for now. Foolhardy seemed insulted at the thought of getting a reward, what a strange turn. He insisted that he wanted only to spread his name, which took me by surprised since he pleads for rewards for every deed. Greedybird began to repetitively try to justify his greediness. Apparently he’s a dragon and apparently dragons hoard wealth. Just because I eat fish it doesn’t make me a shark, Greedybird. Storyteller repeated over and over again (even more later) that he wanted just to make me happy. That’s a cause I can get behind, even if I don’t understand why.

We boarded my house and began to sail east to find the darfellan tribe. I’m not much for sailing but I figured it out, we were just following the shore anyway. We were attacked that night by a giant reptilian fish. After a dangerous battle we stopped the beast. We healed its wounds after tying it up. I fed it some kelp snacks after using some of my magic to tame it. This Dangerous Dinosaur (so called by the Storyteller) would make a good pet. I’ll sick my new Dangersaur on my enemies!

I finished the training of my Corrolax (so called by the Storyteller) and I’ve decided to name him “Royal Rainbow” for the magical spray of colors he produces. I’ve taught him to say his name and he does it now all the time. I might regret that later, but for now he seems to bug the Greedybird so that’s fine.

We arrived on the coast of the Darfellan village. They invited us in and became familiar with me and my group. Greedybird began to inquire about the unimaginable riches. Much to my discomfort, the Tribal leader didn’t attempt to perpetuate my lie… Everything was fine in the end as Greedybird agreed to help for whatever the darfellan would offer.

During the great battle with the Sahuagin, Geedybird and I were both saved by Royal Rainbow. He has turned out to be quite a great asset to the party. In the celebration that followed the Tribal leader stripped himself of jewelry to pay the group. Of course they accepted much to my dismay. I salvaged the magical armor of one of the Sahuagin and I plan to modify it and wear it myself, shame to let such good chitin go to waste! Even among the darfellan tribe I felt out of place while my companions celebrated. This event only throws into reality the fact that I may not belong anywhere. I’ll continue to wander though and hopefully the city of Greenswave holds my destiny within its walls.

(Where has the doctor been this whole time? I should call him the Disappearing Doctor)

Kydos' First Adventure

One night while returning to the peaceful Brownbottom Barrel, I came across a nightmarish monster called a Phthisic attacking an innocent resident of the slums. I immediately rushed in to attack when I was joined by a group of misfits which quickly came to my aid in smiting the foul beast.

Amongst the group’s members, I was able to recognize Grizzle, who had asked me for information about a Hound Archon named Doc Holiday, and Folder Finwick) the infamous Teller of Stories at the Pickled Chicken Leg. There was also a bipedal orca, a dwarf knight, and a troll-ish Singer of Songs. Grizzle said he had found a lead on Doc Holiday and was heading out the next morning if I was interested. Next to the monstrous composition of the group, I’m comfortable that my poor attempts at acting as a human will go unnoticed to any on-lookers so I decided to join up. Before I left with them, I headed to the Church of Pelor to alert Beldan Solus of the Phthisic and the fact that its presence suggests a more powerful Psionic creature is in the city.

The next morning we headed out into the forest following the river up the landscape. Apparently, we are pursuing a green dragon who has started a sort of cult following amongst the lizardfolk in Saycal Forest. I know this because Folder Finwick told me so. Cursed beast. He is neither a gnome nor a dragon, I wonder if he knows this because I didn’t tell him.

On our way to the dragon, we encountered a puddle of money that attacked Grizzle, who is living up to his nickname Greedybird, and a Terrorsaur. Finally, we arrived at the lizard tribes’ camp. Surprisingly, they didn’t attack us on sight. I used the opportunity to sink my tendrils into their mind so they would bring us all up to see the dragon. I managed to tip the balance in our favor when they actually suggested to bring Grizzle and me up to see the dragon. Unfortunately, the rest of the party blindly followed and incurred an attack. We continued up the river when the rest of the party (again blindly following) aggravated the entire tribe to attack us. We took down several of the beasts, but fled to safety after a quick skirmish. I wonder what would’ve happened if the party hadn’t followed us. The large number of lizardfolk would certainly have turned on us after we spoke to the dragon and there would’ve been no way to alert the rest of the misfits for help. Slaughtering them was probably for the best.

A surprise attack in the middle of the night decimated their numbers and the troll-man, so we took a break to recuperate before entering the dragon’s lair. Three of the lizardfolk surrendered and surprisingly, Grizzle was still ready to kill them all. Luckily, the orca Bi! Chuan! would have nothing of that. They ran off into the forest; hopefully they will use their spared lives for some good. The orca and the dwarf apparently can breathe underwater, so they headed into the cave underneath the waterfall. They were in there for some time and I admit I must have dozed off. I dreamt of warm baked delights back home in Bluehill and their enticing sugary smell. Eventually, I was woken by the orca who said he had found the dragon’s lair. One at a time his sea horse pulled us non-water breathers through the waterfall into a cave. And, of course, before talking to the dragon we attack him. As he’s beginning to be worn down, the dragon starts giving Grizzle information about Doc Holiday who has apparently had his soul devoured by the dark skull artifact.

Even though the dragon surrended, we killed him anyways. Dragons don’t do no good to nobody, and I know that because Folder Finwick told me so. Besides, leaving an evil youngling alive to come back and kill us when he’s older seems incredibly short-sighted.

Kydos's Second Adventure
Fulfillment of Debt Part 1

In return for my accompanying the maladjusted and mismatched misfits to the lizardfolk tribe, we are working on cleaning up this city. Oh, how she needs it. Beldan Solus informed me that they have noticed the activites of Cult of the Innocent Face and their kidnappings of young blond women from the slums. Of course, this goes unnoticed to those fools called Guards. Of course, convincing these folk to journey with me was much easier than I expected. Grizzle is searching for his lost dark skull artifact, and Folder Finwick has been longing to search out the Undercity to hunt aliens. I’m going to have to watch him very carefully from now on.

We stumbled upon a kidnapping in the process, which we immediately halted. The girl was spared and the leader kept alive for interrogation. We returned to the Church of Pelor for the girl’s sake and to question our witness. Several mind probings later, I discover she is working for a demon named Jillmallos who is collecting artifacts as foci for his depraved rituals. Their location is hidden in the Undercity and the demon residing behind a locked door with a demon carved into the surface. We encourage her to repent her sins and atone, and despite her claims to forgiveness she is clearly not interested. I have not given up on her yet. Even the most vile humans deserve their fair chance.

After some preparations, we headed into the Undercity through the main gate using Foolhardy’s pass. I really should learn his name, but it’s so damn long. Sir Foolhardy doesn’t seem to be any more polite. Immediately after the gates were shut, we were beset by an alien which confounded Foolhardy into attacking the rest of us. After dispatching the purple people eater (which I assume is what it does), the less physical types of the party scattered. Apparently, the battle did not go well and we had to return to the city to resupply and reincarnate a horse.

Several delays later, we again head into the Undercity through the main gate using Sir Foolhardy’s pass. We search out the warehouse they are hiding in. The building is identical to the image burned into my mind, so we continue onwards by…. knocking? I guess I suggested it, too, it turned out well. We slaughtered many cultists and demons and raised hell for their sins. Unfortunately, we found a young woman already sacrificed. If only I had thought to open that door, I may have been able to save her.

We stopped here for a short rest, and will continue into the temple soon. I can only hope we can prevent more suffering.

Bi! Chuan's! log 4

Entry 4

I waes sutopp ! by thu ! aerfullaen ul ! ur; our group waes put in khaergu of ! ufun ! ing ae ! aerfullaen aertifaekt. Unfoartunaetuly, aelthough thu objukt waes ! uskrib ! to mu, I waes nuvur aeblu to suu it sinku Gru ! ybir ! sutaesh ! thu thing aewaey in somu maegikael room in thu AErkaenu Guil ! . Hopufully I kaen woark somuthing out to gut thaet sutaetuu, aelthough I ! on’t think Gru ! ybir ! woul ! bu willsuting to givu it up un ! ur aeny kirkumsutaenkus.

Wu mut in town suppos ! ly to go hunt somu gruun ! raegon naem ! AEkhuaek Molik foar Gru ! ybir ! . AEppaeruntly thu ! raegon haes somu wuaelth thaet gru ! y bir ! waents, no surprisu thuru. Nuvur thu luss, wu follow ! thu kruw through thu foarusut to fin ! thu tribu of lizaer ! folk thaet guaer ! thu ! raegon’s laeir.

I spunt thu truk through thu Saeykael foarusut traeining ! to futkh; hu’s gutting prutty goo ! aet graebbing mu baenaenaes aen ! sutuff right out of truus.

Nuaering our goael, wu foun ! ae pon ! with ae pilu of gol ! aet thu bottom. Gru ! ybir ! luaept sutraeight aet it aen ! got whollop ! by somu sutraengu oozy kruaeturu. Mu aen ! mysutury wrukk ! thu monsutur aen ! graebb ! thu gol ! out of spitu if foar no othur ruaeson. Gutting ae big pilu of gol ! fult prutty goo ! , I hopu Gru ! ybir ! isn’t rubbing off on mu.

Wu spunt suvurael ! aeys pursing ae turrifying ! inosaeur ! own thu rivur. I waes kontunt with lutting thu buaesut roaem, but Sutoarytullur konvink ! mu thaet sukh ae powurful aenimael aelly woul ! bu vury usuful in our futuru un ! uaevoars. AEs it snaetkh ! monkuys out of thu truus, I tri ! to khaerm thu buaesut. My spulls wuru inuffuktivu thu wholu timu aen ! wu gaevu up aeftur ae ! aey of following it.

Wu uvuntuaelly sutumbl ! sutraeight into thu villsutaegu of thu Lizaer ! Folk. AEftur somu ! iskussion with thu guaer ! s (aen ! somu slight kombaet) wu hae ! ae gui ! u into thu villsutaegu. Thu gui ! u waes aekting raethur sutraengu, ae bit nikur thaen I woul ! uxpukt konsi ! uring thaet wu hae ! jusut killsut ! his friun ! s. Wu follow ! thu gui ! u into thu villsutaegu aen ! wuru imm ! iaetuly aettaekk ! . Wu wuru quikkly ovurwhulm ! aen ! foark ! to rutruaet, whikh woul ! n’t haevu buun possiblu if not foar mu kompulling thu junglu to hol ! baekk our aettaekkurs.

Thaet night wu aettaekk ! thu lizaer ! folk aegaein, this timu hopufully whilu thuy wuru sluuping. It turn ! out to bu ae pooarly konkuiv ! plaen sinku thu lizaer ! s kaen suu in thu ! aerk aen ! wu kaennot. Wu killsut ! uvury onu of thum. I kaen’t suum to rukaell why wu aeru uvun huru aenymoaru; oh it waes bukaeusu of Gru ! ybir ! ’s unpaeraellul ! lusut foar truaesuru thaet wu jusut killsut ! ae tribu of mosutly haermluss lizaer ! s. Oh wull, thuy aeru thu vilu proguny of thu suruly uvil ! raegon, so purhaeps it waes jusutifi ! in somu kruul waey.

Foolhaer ! y, whilu wuaering thu AEnkusutrael Ring of thu ! aerfullaen, aen ! I ! ovu into thu waeturfaell aen ! naevigaet ! aen un ! urwaetur maezu to fin ! thu laeir of AEkhuaek Molik. Vunturing aewaey from our kaepaeblu group fillsut ! mu with ! oubt, foar I hae ! only Foolhaer ! y with mu aen ! hu woul ! kurtaeinly put us in ! aengur. Wu uvuntuaelly swaem into ae pokkut of aeir aen ! wuru aettaekk ! by moaru lizaer ! folk. Foolhaer ! y aen ! I sutoo ! our groun ! aegaeinsut thu kluaerly supurioar fou. With ae huaeping hulping of aess whooping, wu wuru viktoarious. Mysutury aen ! I wunt baekk to gut thu rusut of thu group so wu koul ! kontinuu on into thu kaevu.

! uupur in, wu foun ! thu laeir of AEkhuik Molik. AEftur ae long fight Gru ! ybir ! got thu infoarmaetion out of thu ! raegon aen ! wu sluw him. Wu took his hoaer ! to sull baekk in town, inklu ! ing ae faentaesutikaelly kraeft ! krown whikh I pursonaelly took, mukh to thu ! ispluaesuru of Gru ! ybir ! .

On thu trip baekk, wu follow ! thu rivur in aen aettumpt to fin ! thu Turroarsaeur. Wu wuru sukkussful in hunting him ! own aen ! this timu hu waes unaeblu to rusisut my luru bukaemu smittun with mu. I l ! him baekk to thu okuaen aen ! my boaet whuru hu is munkhing khimpykulp snaekks aen ! aewaeiting traeining.

Gru ! ybir ! kupt on trying to sutuael thu krown, so I raemm ! it onto my nukk so hu koul ! n’t taeku it whilu I slupt. It waes quitu unkomfoartaeblu, but woarth it to kuup Gru ! ybir ! aewaey. I plaen on trae ! ing it to him foar thu juwul ! sutaetuu aen ! I kaen’t ! o thaet if hu sutuaels it.

I was stopped by the darfellan elder; our group was put in charge of defending a darfellan artifact. Unfortunately, although the object was described to me, I was never able to see it since Greedybird stashed the thing away in some magical room in the Arcane Guild. Hopefully I can work something out to get that statue, although I don’t think Greedybird would be willing to give it up under any circumstances.

We met in town supposedly to go hunt some green dragon named Achuak Molik for Greedybird. Apparently the dragon has some wealth that greedy bird wants, no surprise there. Never the less, we followed the crew through the forest to find the tribe of lizard folk that guard the dragon’s lair.

I spent the trek through the Saycal forest training Ed to fetch; he’s getting pretty good at grabbing me bananas and stuff right out of trees.

Nearing our goal, we found a pond with a pile of gold at the bottom. Greedybird leapt straight at it and got wholloped by some strange oozy creature. Me and mystery wrecked the monster and grabbed the gold out of spite if for no other reason. Getting a big pile of gold felt pretty good, I hope Greedybird isn’t rubbing off on me.

We spent several days pursing a terrifying dinosaur down the river. I was content with letting the beast roam, but Storyteller convinced me that such a powerful animal ally would be very useful in our future endeavors. As it snatched monkeys out of the trees, I tried to charm the beast. My spells were ineffective the whole time and we gave up after a day of following it.

We eventually stumbled straight into the village of the Lizard Folk. After some discussion with the guards (and some slight combat) we had a guide into the village. The guide was acting rather strange, a bit nicer than I would expect considering that we had just killed his friends. We followed the guide into the village and were immediately attacked. We were quickly overwhelmed and forced to retreat, which wouldn’t have been possible if not for me compelling the jungle to hold back our attackers. The only casualty was Royal Rainbow, my beloved bird. He fragile frame stuck to my shoulder by globs of sticky acid. The blame is entirely mine, although there was nothing I could have done to save him, I shouldn’t have brought him. And to imagine his soul mate flew away just days before. I will deal swift death to his murderers!

That night we attacked the lizard folk again, this time hopefully while they were sleeping. It turned out to be a poorly conceived plan since the lizards can see in the dark and we cannot. We killed every one of them. I can’t seem to recall why we are even here anymore; oh it was because of Greedybird’s unparalleled lust for treasure that my poor Royal Rainbow was given away to death, vengeance drives me forward now!

Foolhardy, while wearing the Ancestral Ring of the Darfellan, and I dove into the waterfall and navigated an underwater maze to find the lair of Achuak Molik. Venturing away from our capable group filled me with doubt, for I had only Foolhardy with me and he would certainly put us in danger. We eventually swam into a pocket of air and were attacked by more lizard folk. Foolhardy and I stood our ground against the clearly superior foe. With a heaping helping of ass whooping, we were victorious. Mystery and I went back to get the rest of the group so we could continue on into the cave.

Deeper in, we found the lair of Achuik Molik. After a long fight Greedybird got the information out of the dragon and we slew him. We took his hoard to sell back in town, including a fantastically crafted crown which I personally took, much to the displeasure of Greedybird.

On the trip back, we followed the river in an attempt to find the Terrorsaur. We were successful in hunting him down and this time he was unable to resist my lure became smitten with me. I led him back to the ocean and my boat where he is munching chimpykelp snacks and awaiting training.

Greedybird kept on trying to steal the crown, so I rammed it onto my neck so he couldn’t take it while I slept. It was quite uncomfortable, but worth it to keep Greedybird away. I plan on trading it to him for the jeweled statue and I can’t do that if he steals it.

Bi! Chuan's! log 5

Entry 5

Gru offur! mu ae trae!u. In uxkhaengu foar thu krown hu woul! givu mu thu sutaetuu aes long aes hu waes aeblu to visit it aen! sluup on it if hu nu!! to. I know thu sutaetuu is vaesutly moaru vaeluaeblu thaen thu krown so it !ousn’t maeku sunsu thaet Gru woul! maeku sukh ae trae!u, hu kluaerly haes somuthing up his sluuvu.

I sol! thu krown so Gru mo his offur: this timu I waes to givu him nothing in uxkhaengu foar thu sutaetuu, so I aekkupt!. I liku thaet kin! of businuss. Haeving no whuru saefu to put thu aebsur!ly vaeluaeblu sutaetuu, I aellow! Gru to hol! onto it. Thaet ruaelly konfus! him, but it suums liku his room is aebout thu saefusut plaeku.

Wu wuru gaethur! in thu Khikkun Lug by Sutoarytullur. Wu aeru to bu huae!ing into thu Un!urkity to hunt !own ae kult of !umon woarshipurs. I !on’t suu why wu shoul! go looking foar troublu in ae plaeku liku thaet, it kaen only un! up in somuonu gutting hurt, aen! I’m not aessuming it’s thu kultisuts.

Wu waelk! into thu Un!urkity to suuk out this sutraengu kult. AEn aeb!uktion waes taeking plaeku aes wu sutroll! by aen!, lukky foar hur, wu wuru thuru to sutop it. Turns out thu aeb!uktoars wuru kult mumburs aen! onu of thu kult luae!urs haeppun! to bu with thum. Wu wuru aessisut! by somu sutraengu maen in ae maesk. Whaet is with us aettraekting sukh wuir! puoplu? Inturusuting wu n’t killsut! thu maen, hu hae! ae paelpaeblu aeir of sae!nuss aeroun! him, woaru ae kloaek aen! hi! his i!untity; I’vu nuvur buun aeblu to aepply aell thu “killsut on sight” krituriae on ae purson liku thaet bufoaru. Hu hulp us in saeving thu girl, but I sutillsut woul!n’t invitu him aeroun!.

Wu took our hosutaegu, thu kult luae!ur, baekk to thu tumplu of Puloar. I’vu huaer! thaet is ae primu plaeku foar inturrogaetion so thu rusut of thu group to hur to ae baekk room whilu Foolhaer!y aen! I sutoo! outsi!u aen! hop! thaet no onu in thuru waes buing flaey! oar aenything. Thuy wuru aeblu to aeskurtaein thu lokaetion of thu kult’s huae!quaerturs so wu kaen run in thuru aen! muss somu uvil !ours up.

Wu waeit! foar thu foggiusut !aey to go trukking in aegaein. AEt thu timu it mae!u sunsu, but wu n’t sutup moaru thaen 10 fuut into thu Un!urkity bufoaru wu wuru aettaekk!. Thu foul kruaeturu waes killsut! uaesily unough but somuthing aebout it kompull! Foolhaer!y to aettaekk us. Mysutury aen! I raen to !isaerm him aen! hol! him baekk whilu thu rusut of thu group raen aewaey into thu fog. Thosu kowaer!s wuru konkurn! moaru foar thuir own livus thaen thu saefuty of Foolhaer!y oar Nightmaeru. I waesn’t buing ae maertyr; I waesn’t saekrifiking mysulf to saevu thu group, but I guuss thaet’s whaet thuy thought though bukaeusu thuy took thuir khaenkus to run aewaey to saefuty. Thuy n’t uvun try to gut hulp. In my laenguaegu wu haevu ae woar! foar thum, !ukkurs.

!uring thu fight, Foolhaer!y’s hoarsu, AEnuvaey, uskaep! into thu fog. AElthough wu pursu! him aes soon aes wu wuru aeblu to rugroup, wu koul!n’t fin! him until it waes too laetu. I hulp! Foolhaer!y taeku his friun! to thu s outsi!u of town who klaeim! thuy woul! bu aeblu to bring him baekk. Thuy brought him baekk in, but into thu bo!y of ae giaent baet. I shaer! ae ‘shroom with thu s aen! offur! my survikus shoul! thuy uvur nu! hulp. I supposu it is impoartaent to uxpaen! thaet fullowship.

Wu wunt baekk to thu Un!urkity aen! this timu ruaekh! thu huae!quaerturs unmolusut!. Wu khaerg! in aen! un!! thu lifu of ae bunkh of !umon summoning / filth woarshipping kultisuts. AElright thun, I suru hopu thuru is somuthing !ownsutaeirs bukaeusu thusu fuw wizaeron’t suum to bu mukh of ae thruaet.


Greedybird offered me a trade. In exchange for the crown he would give me the statue as long as he was able to visit it and sleep on it if he needed to. I know the statue is vastly more valuable than the crown so it doesn’t make sense that Greedybird would make such a trade, he clearly has something up his sleeve.

I sold the crown so Greedybird modified his offer: this time I was to give him nothing in exchange for the statue, so I accepted. I like that kind of business. Having no where safe to put the absurdly valuable statue, I allowed Greedybird to hold onto it. That really confused him, but it seems like his room is about the safest place.

We were gathered in the Chicken Leg by Storyteller. We are to be heading into the Undercity to hunt down a cult of demon worshipers. I don’t see why we should go looking for trouble in a place like that, it can only end up in someone getting hurt, and I’m not assuming it’s the cultists.

We walked into the Undercity to seek out this strange cult. An abduction was taking place as we strolled by and, lucky for her, we were there to stop it. Turns out the abductors were cult members and one of the cult leaders happened to be with them. We were assisted by some strange man in a mask. What is with us attracting such weird people? Interesting we didn’t killed the man, he had a palpable air of sadness around him, wore a cloak and hid his identity; I’ve never been able to apply all the “kill on sight” criteria on a person like that before. He did help us in saving the girl, but I still wouldn’t invite him around.

We took our hostage, the cult leader, back to the temple of Pelor. I’ve heard that is a prime place for interrogation so the rest of the group to her to a back room while Foolhardy and I stood outside and hoped that no one in there was being flayed or anything. They were able to ascertain the location of the cult’s headquarters so we can run in there and mess some evil doers up.

We waited for the foggiest day to go trekking in again. At the time it made sense, but we didn’t step more than 10 feet into the Undercity before we were attacked. The foul creature was killed easily enough but something about it compelled Foolhardy to attack us. Mystery and I ran to disarm him and hold him back while the rest of the group ran away into the fog. Those cowards were concerned more for their own lives than the safety of Foolhardy or Nightmare. I wasn’t being a martyr; I wasn’t sacrificing myself to save the group, but I guess that’s what they thought though because they took their chances to run away to safety. They didn’t even try to get help. In my language we have a word for them, !uckers.

During the fight, Foolhardy’s horse, Anevay, escaped into the fog. Although we pursued him as soon as we were able to regroup, we couldn’t find him until it was too late. I helped Foolhardy take his deceased friend to the druids outside of town who claimed they would be able to bring him back. They brought him back indeed, but into the body of a giant bat. I shared a ‘shroom with the druids and offered my services should they ever need help. I suppose it is important to expand that fellowship.

We went back to the Undercity and this time reached the headquarters unmolested. We charged in and ended the life of a bunch of demon summoning / filth worshipping cultists. Alright then, I sure hope there is something downstairs because these few wizards don’t seem to be much of a threat.

Journal of Thromson Hellbound
Entry 1

I happened upon some adventurers stopping a kidnapping of sorts occurring in the slums. Unfortunately it was not cloudy that day and the source of Focalor’s Lightning became known, myself. Despite this, the adventurers, a half-dragon of some sort, a poor man, a Darfellan, a gnome who seems to talk ceaselessly yet intelligently, a Knight and his Squire did not attempt to attack me. I was pleased that I did not have to flee and pleasantly surprised to find that they wished for my assistance in the undercity. We took the prisoner that we had captured during our sojourn and left.

We journeyed forth from the spot of the kidnapping and headed to the local Temple of Pelor. From there we headed to the “Interrogation” room of the local temple, rather odd for them to have one if you ask me… but heresy can happen even in the most devout places, and I would not be surprised if less forgiving clerics existed within the confines of the Sun god’s temple. Regardless, I digress from my point. We took the woman and began to interrogate her, the poor man seemed to know information that was privy to only the woman herself, a mind reader of some sort perhaps? With his clever wording and the silver tongue of the half dragon as well as my own masks removal we managed to coerce her into revealing the location of her temple. With that we left her to her fate, whatever it may be. I hope she does not take the path that my own damned soul once took.

After leaving from the temple, we headed to the undercity as was the original plan. I bound Focalor and took upon his mantle of sorrow once more as we moved forward. Once within the confines of the undercity, of which the guards had warned us, we proceeded forward only to be attacked by a strange purple creature. Our party set upon the monster and killed it but not before the strange aura that had surrounded it had caused the Knight and his apprentice to go Berserk. They attacked, with many of the party running away, I myself backed off knowing of the fragility of myself in comparison to a rough adventurer like the Knight or Druid. I however, blasted bolt after bolt of Lightning, though through the influence of the Prince of Tears, it pained me to do so. After the Knight had been subdued, we beat a hasty retreat to the temple where we received a great deal of healing from the local priest.

After the Knights wounds had been healed he began to rant and rave about his horse. Understandable, for the horse to my understanding, was his first. A noble goal if any and the party agreed with my silent thoughts. We ventured forth back into the undercity, avoiding enemies because of the influence of the nearby fog. After finding the remains of his horse, we took the horse to a nearby circle of druids who I had not noticed upon my travels back into the city, rather strange. We had the horse reincarnated for a sum of 1,000 gold and it came back as a rather large and monstrous bat. That it did not attack us for it’s animal intelligence startled me and it seemed to acquiesce to both the Knight and the Squire’s wishes. Despite this it was apparent that the horse turned bat was uncomfortable and it stayed to receive a weeks training in “learning to be a bat”. How unusual.

We moved forth from the Druid’s circle and went back to the City. From there we took a day off, recovering from wounds and the like. In the morning I made the necessary signs and drew the circle for focalor in water, never an easy task. It proved difficult and my binding runes turned out to be sloppy, Focalor had once again influenced me, leaving me with the need to say a few words for those who had departed. Despite this personal setback, my friends still not knowing of my abilities joined with me and we all went to the undercity to lay seige to this foul temple of demons.

We found the temple quickly, throwing open the doors and finding it to be inhabited by many a foul cultist and demon. We struck quickly and within the space of a minute we managed to subdue many of them before they could call for backup. I write this quickly before we head further into the temple. Despite Focalor’s nagging influence I hope that the demon worshipping scum die.

Bi! Chuans! Log 6

Untry 6

Its buun ae long timu sinku I’vu writtun. Sinku slaeughturing thu kultisuts, so mukh haes haeppun! aen! I jusut haevun’t hae! thu timu in thu mi!sut of thu uxkitumunt! But now I fin! mysulf boar! aeftur ae hunt whilu on ae journuy with my friun!s on my khitin kruaetion, so I haevu ae momunt to writu in my log.

So wu wuru in thu un!urkity slaeughturing kultisuts foar thu saeku of Sutoarytullurs waen!urlusut aen! things wuru going aes plaenn!. Wu broku into ae khaembur aen! foun! thaet suvurael kultisuts hae! jusut mur ae young womaen. Shu hae! hur guts pull! out of hur aen! waes quitu , so wu mae!u thu kultisuts . Wu killsut! aell but onu whom wu knokk! unkonskious aen! plaek! on thu saekrifikiael aeltaer. I kut somu guts out of ae kultisut aen! laei! thum aell ovur thu unkonskious onu’s bo!y, boy waes hu in foar ae surprisu whun hu woku up. Sutoarytullur n’t liku waetkhing mu kut up ae purson jusut foar ae joku, but thusu mun wuru liku aenimaels with no purposu, not uvun fit foar uaeting. Thuy wuru kurtaeinly not woarth of ruspukt from mu. Hae, look aet mu trying to jusutify my aektions, I !on’t owu thusu aenything.

Wu wuru aeppaeruntly hunting ae !umon naem! Jil’Maelos. Hu hae! suael! himsulf buhin! aen imprugnaeblu waell aen! wu wuru to sutroll in thuru aen! killsut him. Firsut wu hae! to hunt !own ae fuw kuys thaet wuru hul! by thu liuutunaents of thu !umon. I hop! thaet wu koul! haevu aesk! foar thu kuys, but thaet turn! out to not bu aen option so wu bugaen to hunt thum !own. Wu sutumbl! into thu libraery aen! loot! thu plaeku. Wu foun! ae journael thaet thu luae!ur of thu kult group kupt aen! it waes surprisingly insightful aes to thu aektivitius of thu !umon. It tol! us aebout aell thu things wu koul! fin! in thu plaeku aes wull aes waeys to ovurkomu thum. Too bae! wu visit! thu libraery laesut aen! by thaet timu wu aelruae!y busut! uvurything thu haer! waey. Thu journael tull us aebout ae “fish” thaet waes aeppaeruntly aeblu to busut Jil’Maelos thaet waes somuwhuru in thu suwurs. Thaet is sutillsut on our to-!o lisut.

Whun wu aettaekk! Jil’Maelos (aeftur killsuting thu liuutunaents aen! gaethuring thu kuys) hu us! his maegik to taeku kontrol of Foolhaer!y’s min!. Hu is not ae goo! purson to haevu on thu si!u aegaeinsut us aen! it is quitu upsutting thaet maegik haes foark! him to butraey us aegaein. I sunsu hu willsut bu gaeining ae nuw naemu soon.

With aell of our prupaeraetion thu baettlu waes sutillsut baeruly won. Sutoarytullur waesn’t aeblu to pr!ikt thu kruaeturu’s aebilitius aes wull aes wu hae! hop!, but wu wuru aeblu to skraepu out ae viktoary bukaeusu I hae! jusut how to shaepu mysulf into ae buaesut aen! I us! thaet to gruaet ae!vaentaegu.

Wu klaeim! thu maegik itums thaet thu !umon hae! buun gaethuring, inklu!ing ae maegikael kloaek thaet woul! aellow onu to kontrol vurmin! Thaet robu intrigu! mu bukaeusu it woul! aellow mu to !ominaetu thu giaent kraebs thaet I oftun hunt. Sutoarytullur waern! mu thaet thu itum might bu kurs!, so wu waeit! to gut it maegikaelly i firsut. Unfoartunaetuly it waes so wu got ri! of thu thing. Wu got ri! of thu rusut of thu !isgusuting itums aen! finish! klaeiming our viktoary on thu Kult of thu Innokunt faeku.

Thu nuxt !aey Sutoarytullur tol! us of ae buaesut thaet wu koul! fin! in thu Saeykael foarusut, aen aenimael so fiurku thaet it woul! maeku ae gruaet put! Not to muntion ae purfukt subjukt foar my nuw traensfoarmaetion skillsuts. So wu ro!u into thu junglu to hunt thu buaesut. With Sutoarytullurs knowl!gu of thu !inosaeur aen! my survivael skillsuts, wu foun! it in jusut ae fuw !aeys. Wu taem! it aen! took it homu. I tri! to think of thu fiurkusut naemu I koul! foar my nuw klaew kovur! blun!ur aen! rusut! on thu naemu “Rux”.


Its been a long time since I’ve written. Since slaughtering the cultists, so much has happened and I just haven’t had the time in the midst of the excitement! But now I find myself bored after a hunt while on a journey with my friends on my chitin creation, so I have a moment to write in my log.

So we were in the undercity slaughtering cultists for the sake of Storytellers wanderlust and things were going as planned. We broke into a chamber and found that several cultists had just murdered a young woman. She had her guts pulled out of her and was quite dead, so we made the cultists dead. We killed all but one whom we knocked unconscious and placed on the sacrificial altar. I cut some guts out of a dead cultist and laid them all over the unconscious one’s body, boy was he in for a surprise when he woke up. Storyteller didn’t like watching me cut up a dead person just for a joke, but these men were like animals with no purpose, not even fit for eating. They were certainly not worth of respect from me. Ha, look at me trying to justify my actions, I don’t owe these dead anything.

We were apparently hunting a demon named Jil’Malos. He had sealed himself behind an impregnable wall and we were to stroll in there and kill him. First we had to hunt down a few keys that were held by the lieutenants of the demon. I hoped that we could have asked for the keys, but that turned out to not be an option so we began to hunt them down. We stumbled into the library and looted the place. We found a journal that the leader of the cult group kept and it was surprisingly insightful as to the activities of the demon. It told us about all the things we could find in the place as well as ways to overcome them. Too bad we visited the library last and by that time we already bested everything the hard way. The journal did tell us about a “fish” that was apparently able to best Jil’Malos that was somewhere in the sewers. That is still on our to-do list.

When we attacked Jil’Malos (after killing the lieutenants and gathering the keys) he used his magic to take control of Foolhardy’s mind. He is not a good person to have on the side against us and it is quite upsetting that magic has forced him to betray us again. I sense he will be gaining a new name soon.

With all of our preparation the battle was still barely won. Storyteller wasn’t able to predict the creature’s abilities as well as we had hoped, but we were able to scrape out a victory because I had just discovered how to shape myself into a beast and I used that to great advantage.

We claimed the magic items that the demon had been gathering, including a magical cloak that would allow one to control vermin! That robe intrigued me because it would allow me to dominate the giant crabs that I often hunt. Storyteller warned me that the item might be cursed, so we waited to get it magically identified first. Unfortunately it was so we got rid of the thing. DAMN! We got rid of the rest of the disgusting items and finished claiming our victory on the Cult of the Innocent face.

The next day Storyteller told us of a beast that we could find in the Saycal forest, an animal so fierce that it would make a great pet! Not to mention a perfect subject for my new transformation skills. So we rode into the jungle to hunt the beast. With Storytellers knowledge of the dinosaur and my survival skills, we found it in just a few days. We tamed it and took it home. I tried to think of the fiercest name I could for my new claw covered blender and rested on the name “Rex”.

Bi! Chuans! Log 7

Untry 7

I spunt thu nuxt fuw wuuks traeining my nuw puts. Thu Turroarsaeur haes buun waeiting paetiuntly foar kulp snaekks so I spunt somu timu with him. Baeghuurae is ruspon!ing wull to traeining aen! hu suums to bu gutting aelong with !. Rux wishus hu koul! swim liku !aengursaeur aen! spun!s ae lot of timu in thu waetur. Mu aen! Mysutury wunt on ae fuw hunts toguthur aen! wu took Turroar aen! !aengursaeur out aes wull. AEll thu whilu, Frusutur is woarking aewaey on my itum. Sinku thu robu turn! out to bu kurs! aen! unusaeblu, I kommission! Frusutur to givu my Kraeb Hulm thu aebility to !ominaetu vurmin. It kosut ae prutty koppur, but thu nuxt giaent kraeb I fin! willsut finaelly bu taemaeblu bukaeusu of my nuw maegik.

AEftur Frusutur finish! my itum I foun! thu rusut of thu group. Thuy hae! ae quusut of somu soart. Thuy waent! to go fin! ae maen whosu buun traepp! in aen oarb by ae nukromaenkur on somu islaen!. Gru haes gonu komplutuly nuts, now hu’s taelking to his “faethur”, !ok Holi!aey, ae !og thaet’s traepp! in somu blaekk skull hu foun!. Hu’s buyon! mu totaelly. Sutoarytullur tol! mu thaet !uring thu laesut fuw wuuks hu waes kurs! aen! taeint! in somu waey. Hu is ae bit off but hu !ousn’t suum taeint! so I’m not suru. Gru somutimus mutturs to himsulf aebout buing mae! aet us foar thinking hu’s nuts, whikh maekus him suum uvun kraeziur.

So wu got in thu boaet aen! bugaen to saeil aewaey towaer! thu islaen!. Not but ae !aey off thu koaesut wu sutumbl! upon ae whaeling ship. Wu khaerg! thuir boaet, I intun!! on skaering thum off sinku thuy hae! impael! ae whaelu but thuy aettaekk! with thuir haerpoons. With 2 haerpoons sutikking out of Turroarsaeur, I offur! thum aenothur khaenku to surrun!ur whilu Gru burn! thuir ropus hol!ing onto thu whaelu. I waes totaelly prupaer! to killsut uvury onu of thum, but foartunaetuly thuy raen aewaey. I khaes! aeftur thu whaelu aen! rumov! his haerpoons, taeming him. I gaevu him ae naemu thaet Sutoarytullur kaemu up with: Kyogru. I aessumu it’s thu naemu of somu lugun!aery whaelu, thu protaegonisut of somu aemaezing sutoary.

Sutoarytullur tulls mu thaet thuy whaelurs got thuir purmit from thu Kommon Union, thu vury saemu group thaet klaeim! ownurship of my laen! aen! sutolu it from mu. I woul!n’t fuul aen ounku of rumoarsu if uvury purson thuru bukaemu khum. AEn! I got ae khaenku to maeku somu khum whun thu whaelurs wu lut uskaepu uaerliur sunt somu Lugael Piraeky thugs aeftur us. Thuy fir! upon us so wu turn! thu boaet aeroun! aen! aettaekk! baekk with Turroarsaeur bukaeusu !INOSAEURS KNOW NO MURKY. Thuy vury laesut piraetu bugg! foar his lifu aen! offur! us truaesuru foar his lifu. AEs it turns out, o know somu murky. Uvun though thu truaesuru turn! out to bu ae liu, wu aeru going to lut him livu foar now, hu maey provu to bu somu usu to us laetur.

Until thun, wu saeil on to Nukromaenkur Islaen!.


I spent the next few weeks training my new pets. The Terrorsaur has been waiting patiently for kelp snacks so I spent some time with him. Bagheera is responding well to training and he seems to be getting along with Ed. Rex wishes he could swim like Dangersaur and spends a lot of time in the water. Me and Mystery went on a few hunts together and we took Terror and Dangersaur out as well. All the while, Fruster is working away on my item. Since the robe turned out to be cursed and unusable, I commissioned Fruster to give my Crab Helm the ability to dominate vermin. It cost a pretty copper, but the next giant crab I find will finally be tamable because of my new magic.

After Fruster finished my item I found the rest of the group. They had a quest of some sort. They wanted to go find a man whose been trapped in an orb by a necromancer on some island. Greedybird has gone completely nuts, now he’s talking to his “father”, Doc Holiday, a dog that’s trapped in some black skull he found. He’s beyond me totally. Storyteller told me that during the last few weeks he was cursed and tainted in some way. He is a bit off but he doesn’t seem tainted so I’m not sure. Greedybird sometimes mutters to himself about being mad at us for thinking he’s nuts, which makes him seem even crazier.

So we got in the boat and began to sail away toward the island. Not but a day off the coast we stumbled upon a whaling ship. We charged their boat, I intended on scaring them off since they had impaled a whale but they attacked with their harpoons. With 2 harpoons sticking out of Terrorsaur, I offered them another chance to surrender while Greedybird burned their ropes holding onto the whale. I was totally prepared to kill every one of them, but fortunately they ran away. I chased after the whale and removed his harpoons, taming him. I gave him a name that Storyteller came up with: Kyogre. I assume it’s the name of some legendary whale, the protagonist of some amazing story.

Storyteller tells me that they whalers got their permit from the Common Union, the very same group that claimed ownership of my land and stole it from me. I wouldn’t feel an ounce of remorse if every person there became chum. And I got a chance to make some chum when the whalers we let escape earlier sent some Legal Piracy thugs after us. They fired upon us so we turned the boat around and attacked back with Terrorsaur because DINOSAURS KNOW NO MERCY. They very last pirate begged for his life and offered us treasure for his life. As it turns out, Dinosaurs do know some mercy. Even though the treasure turned out to be a lie, we are going to let him live for now, he may prove to be some use to us later.

Until then, we sail on to Necromancer Island on our new boat, which we renamed “Gnome Mercy”


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